THE CHAOS BLOG

May 4, 2025

womp womp ya'll are getting an update because im so evil (lloyd laughs evilly)

why yes i can spell why do you ask??

uh. OK SO I WENT TO THE COMIC BOOK STORE BCZ THYE SAID THEY WERE PARTICIPATING AND I GOT THREE! COMIC BOOKS. FOR FUCKING FREE. ITS NOT ALL A LIE TO GET PPL TO BUY MORE SHIT!!

nah it was chill. i was pretty low energy the whole time (what happens after a bunch of emotions + dealing with ppl) but it was still fun.

anyways i got my grubby little hands on the EU 2025 special (BAND AU BAND AU BAND AU BAN-) and the 2024 eu special but also the worst bot ever comic thing with ballpoint.

it's a way lighter comic compared to the others but i think thats cool. it was funny to read and yeah.

..it feels like there is something else i should be talking about? like im forgetting something....

actually its my site and i get to ramble abt whatever the fuck i want so take this XD
i've started going to be much earlier than before, (usually asleep b4 midnight) which i pretty awseom bcz then i get to see the sun and participate in life (which can b nice) but it also means that i hit 9 PM and im like.. ok when am i getting to bed... then i hit 10 PM and its like.. why am i not in bed... (with that tho imma leave (hopefully ill update the site a bit tomorrow? i've got some other stuff i'd like to do too) because its just past 11 PM.

see you later, alligator!

April 27, 2025

tired but whatever. im sitting in my room at my computer but the sun is shining and making it hard to see what's on the screen (im probably going to have a headache again). i want to keep working on making a transformers au (becuase that would be fun) but im having such a hard time watching canon stuff (and reading lol) and also making my oc (actually gained an oc from a weird dream i had... yay?)

ive actually been really anxious because of free comic book day XD because thei're doing a comic for the tf skybound run and i really want to get it (it has bluestreak! in a band! with jazz and arcee and blurr and cliffjumper!) but i dont know how FCBD works or if the comic store i go to participates, and i guess because of the little neurodivergend i am that doesnt help. i get all panicky about all the information (the stores website doesnt have a lot of info on it, and other than that they have a facebook page but i dont have a facebook account so i cant see their updates. and facebook is lay out really weirdly (can you tell tumblr almost the only social media app i use? and i use it with X-Kit Rewritten so even then the normal tumblr layout would probably confuse me? oh well.) thankfully ive gotten to the point where the anxiety is sitting around just a little too "deeply" (in the past? embeded in the emotional level of my brain?) so i cant really do anything. it has rejoined the rest of the anxiety i always feel yay! (NOT.) (anxiety sucks, and i dont even have it as bad as others might.)

anyways im probably going to get off of neocities now and see if i can do some drawing.

sidenote: i made a sideblog on tumblr for my art, right, and its really weird because im getting notes on my posts... (admitedly i havent gotten more than 30 notes on any single post, but its tumblr. the MICRO-blogging platform) so im quite happy about that (people like my art!) (also alot of the better know parts of tumblr ARE the posts that get A LOT of likes/reblogs/comments, so its like looking at only a small percentage of what actually gets posted.

anyways ive already written a gazillion words today, im sorry. ill leave now.

April 18, 2025

havent done any work on the website in what feels like too long, but oh well.. i have a blog on tumblr for my art (with barely any stuff on it lol) and im thinking that thats from where i'm going to host my art? for things like what i want to put on my "cool stuff" page i'll probably just host it on neocities...

AND i went to the comic store again (after having gone to two other stores and walking around a lot, so i was pretty tired and my social battery was in the negative, only to get much worse on the bus ride home) and i got more of the skybound transformers comics, which i am v happy about. (im going to have to take pics and put it on my website....) im also kinda curious about the other stuff in the energon universe (EU) now? like specifically the G.I. Joe (which me from a few months ago would hate ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ im just getting used to seeing them so i hate them less now lol) and the Void Rivals.. I dont actually know anything about what is happening in those comics so i would probably check them out online first (from a very reputable source, worry not).

on the bus ride downtown i had a really funny thought about one of my tf ocs so when i got home i made a (very) low effort zine about it. the drawings are ass but i had fun :)

April 7, 2025

im fucking tired.. my life has kinda been all over the place lately. made the mistake of telling someone i wanted to die (that day was specifically worse than other ones) and i got rewarded with a speech about how "other people suffer too" (i had asked something along the lines of "do most ppl have to put their life on pause like i did bcz of being depressed?" also i still have no idea if i legally have depression bcz the fucking report thing is worded THE ABSOLUTE WORST. like. guys. i have no idea what the fuck you mean by this??? anyways. my bad for not fucking understanding your shitty ass legal jargon.)

and then another day i went with a friend to a comic store which was awesome.

i love my friends, they are the awesomest of the awesome.

i bought a bunch of the new transfoerms skybound comics (which i am SUPER HAPPY ABOUT!) and it was nice out that day and now i have transformers comics.

i finally get to one up Sibling One [imagine a creepy creature grinning evily, thats me right now]

anyways i love transformers so much it hurts sometimes. its unreal. literlaly the best explaiation is its how i would imagine falling in love would be for an alloromantic person.

me when i am aromantic and i just fell DEEPLY in love with tranfsormers....

also the amount of transformers i would absolutely kiss... (when im horny, which is rarely) i would absolutely fuck them. AS A TRANSFOERMER MYSELF. because EWWW I HATE MY FUCKING HUMAN BODY WHY THE FUCK AM I TRAPPED IN IT I NEED TO GET OUT!!!!

also the amount of body dysmorphia (i think thats the word) i have been feeling lately...

like the reason i dont feel trans is because if i could have the body i wanted i would take a transformer body. i ain't sticking around in this puny flesh thing ok?

March 14, 2025

yooo im back. ik ik thank you for the applause.

im really tired right now because i didnt sleep... its 9 14 am rn btw.

i decided that it was actually a great idea to not sleep so i spent the night on tumblr and random websites. helps that i watched tv till around 1 30 am....

i went to see a Kraftwerk concert thought!!! it was really fun, and it was awesome too because its fricken KRAFTWERK!!

I came home at the end of the trip with some cool stuff:
1 kraftwerk tee shirt. im wearing it rn :D
2 a kraftwerk patch
3 transformers: one DVD!!! supre happy about that I LOVE TRANSFORMERS SO FUCKING MUCH OMG
4 a linkin park cd! hybrid theory bcz its a banger album.

the trip was really fun too.

and if for a few minutes of the concert prowl was sitting w/ me and vibing.. yes he was. it was nice that he could come, even for just a short bit

February 25, 2025

Hello Folx!!!

I dont really know what to put here. I'm often scared I will say too much on the internet so that's not helping XD.

I started listening to Linkin Park more seriously recently, and I found their "Hybrid Theory" album. It's been playing on loop for a few days now. I really like it. It's just really raw, and the lyrics resonate in me.

I've also been interested in Transformers for a few months now, but I still haven't gotten round to reading the comics. Sibling One keeps bugging me about it, and I feel guilty... I do want to read the comics, I've often found American Comics a quite hard medium to read. Somthing about the art style and text fonts, I suppose.
That's one advantage to watching the shows, is that I find them easier to digest. My favourite so far is definitly Earthspark. I've started the G1 cartoon, but I'm going slowly. Sibling One watched Animated and quite enjoyed it. I, on the other hand, barely got through a few episodes. Something about it really annoyse me. Oh well. Same with Prime. I don't mind watching the episodes, but it's quite hard to actually sit down to watch.

On the whole thought, I do look forwards to looking at more Transformers stuff.

Fan content is a lot easier for me to motivate myself to look at, which, looking at myself, I think makes sense.